Love and Valentines Day and Pimps and Hos.

Hello everyone!! Did you make it through Valentine's day okay? I wanted to blog about it , but then I didn't. I can't really think of what to post today so I went over my list of things that pop into my head for blog topics and then I had to cross off like five because if you think what I say is inappropriate here, you should see what don't post. Part politically incorrect, part WTF and all awesome, some things just can't make the cut. That's the kind of stuff you have to hear from me in person, so you should totally come hang out with me at one of my events and you'll see for yourself. It's fun.

So maybe this will be about love, and maybe Valentine's day, you know how we roll here. I just kind of go.

First of all, I get nauseated when men/people take a stand and call Valentine's Day the Hallmark Holiday..it's too commericial....I love you every day so why should I treat you special today....etc...This is me waving my middle finger at you. Don't get all pious about Valentine's Day being commercial if you participate in every other holiday, plus superbowl, plus you wear any kind of team/sports branding. You suck. Hallmark has whored out every holiday all it can and you people all participate in the tradition of sending holiday cards to pretend you're sending holiday cheer to people you haven't seen in like 200 years. Women, if you wont show up in a fashion show wearing your favorite Target jeans but you are saying you don't care if you get flowers or not because it's SO commercial, you're getting a finger wave too. Liars.

I don't buy that for one second. I think a vast majority of people participate in the corporate game of pimps n hoes that drives the global retail industry.

The women are to blame too. Valentine's flowers and presents are like the equivalent of penis extensions for men. Especially in an office setting. OH MY!! LOOK HOW MUCH HE LOVES ME!! This unspoken competition of who got the best flowers goes on all day and continues on facebook where pictures fly up the news feed of large arrangements and ugly teddy bears captioned "Aww" or ";)" "soo unexpected, love you baby"

Some women use flower sending as a tool to make women/men jealous and keep themselves from appearing as if no one loves them.

I am not saying that every man should send flowers on Valentine's day. I'm also not saying you're a tool for falling prey to commercial influence. I'm saying don't be a hypocrite in your designer sunglasses and jeans while you wag your finger at the retailers. If Valentine's Day is important to your girl, send her the damn flowers. Write her a poem. Recognize it. Or don't...but don't get this holier than thou attitude about it if you're dressed in head to toe NFL. That makes you a hypocrite.


Did I get flowers for Valentine's Day? No, but my currency is chocolate. There better be some damn chocolate. I work from home though so I don't have any b words to compete with. If I were in an office, I think I would probably send myself a singing midget in a sea turtle costume holding Starbucks in one hand and Dr. Pepper in the other sitting in a tray of reese's peanut butter cups. That's true love.


Til next time!!
xoxo