This Can't Be Good TMI ALERT
Warning: This blog contains references to my period and some stuff about going to the dentist. If you're going to be a whiny baby and complain about TMI, then you're going to need to close your browser now. If you continue to read, then it's your damn fault and I will not listen to anything you say unless it's good mocking material . Yes I am aware the whole world can read this. That is the point. Thank you.
Okay, so according to last month's rant, entitled WTF, I was going to track my emotional meltdowns. I usually get a really bad one once every month. It could be about anything. It's usually really stupid, or I wil take a valid point and get so up in arms about it that I might find it funny at a later date. Possibly. As long as it's not around "that" time and then it would probably trigger another insane meldtown. It would be like meltdown squared. The kids don't even fight with me, they run for cover and sometimes bring alcohol to my room while I'm bawling in the dark. Not kidding.
The good thing is , is that so far, the last 4 times, I have noticed a pattern and been able to predict it within 3 or 4 days, but I actually have documentation from last time. So, today or tomorrow, someone's getting death threats. I've been really good about warning people. It's embarrassing though when hell week happens on vacation and you're travelling with another family. I had to do that once and I ended up taking the wife aside and explaining it so that when the meltdown did happen, they would understand. It happened the next day and no one said anything. She was really cool about it and even related.
I usually get really angry, really fast, and my emotions explode like a water balloon inside my face, and I say something really mean and possibly with a bad word in it and then I go to my room and jump under blankets and cry as hard as I can for 15 minutes. If I am left alone, I will be okay. But someone better at least check on me and hug me first or I might think they don't care and throw another hellish fit. I can't explain it, but the anger is like, psycho angry and it comes fast and hard, and I can't not dissolve into tears. I'm sure I look insane.
So, tomorrow is my first dentist appointment in 8 years. The last time it has been over 10 years since a cleaning and the hygeniest ripped apart my gums and muttered under her breath and told me I needed to come every six months. Turned out I had ZERO cavities and no gingivitis even. So screw her. I brush and floss (sometimes floss, only on top, my bottom teeth are so crowded it wont fit , which is why Im getting braces or invisalign in Feb) anyway, I take pretty good care of my teeth and the only reason Im going for a cleaning is because I can't take the impressions for invisalign without a proper cleaning.
If they give me all kinds of attitude, what in the hell is going to happen if tomorrow is D day? I swear I think I have PMDD, but only for one day of the month.
I'm really scared of the dentist and I'm also scared I'm going to leave the office wearing a bib with all their trays upended and cotton hanging out of my mouth and drool all over my front.
Not good. Not good at all.