Back to Reality.

What's up, fishes???

I am back!!! We had an amazing honeymoon, and I promise I will tell you stories from it.  I'm kind of under the gun right now to do things other than blog, but I find that if I don't keep yall posted, then you tend to disappear.  I love you and I don't want you to disappear.

Yes, you.  I love you.   Aww...hug?

So anyways, we came back, and the next day our oldest child needed to be taken to camp in Hendersonville, three hours away. David took her, and they got pulled over for expired tags.  Whoops. Sorry David, I can relate because I got pulled over right before the honeymoon for the same thing.  Except he got a ticket and I didn't.  Why? Because I had cupcakes and I gave the cop one.  And by cupcakes, I don't mean any kind of euphamism, so don't be jerks.  I had actual cupcakes, from this dreamy bakery called Tizzerts.

I also think the cop thought I was amusing.  I was late to take my lovely friend her cake, and because being pulled over mad me even later, I decided to take a picture of the cop lights in my rearview mirror to prove that I wasn't just messing around.  I actually had a valid reason for being late.  And the cop was taking forever to come out of the car and read me the riot act anyway, so I decided to amuse myself. Except he walked up right as I was snapping the picture , so you can see him and the lights in it.  He's like "Are you facebooking being pulled over?"

So, I started laughing, because what else do you do? I mean, I got caught with expired tags.  I'm not showing you my boobs dude, and crying tends to piss them off even more.  So, I laughed.  And then I offered him a cupcake.  And then I asked to tell me please how do I renew my tags.  I really don't know.  It's kind of a man job, I've never had to do it myself.  I actually said that.  Then burst out laughing again.   He shook my head and then asked me where the cupcake came from, it was delicious. 

Tizzerts Bakery, thank you.  The icing is dreamy.  It was Lemon Raspberry. You should get one.

So, guess what though.  David got a ticket.  He didn't have a cupcake. 

Moral of the story: I never get tickets.  I know that doesn't really help you much, but I'm pretty proud of myself. I have never tried to get out of a ticket, never cried, never shown cleavage.  I usually just somehow get out of it.  So maybe the lesson here is not to manipulate, it's to be yourself. You can't control other people's responses, so don't even try.  And always carry cupcakes.

Anyways, after David gets a ticket, he takes our daugher to camp and they realize she doesn't have the required physical form. Not only that but she never had a physical either.

Looks like so far, we suck at paperwork in this household don't we? 

So, she needs a physical .  David has a business trip the next day, which was Monday.  Yesterday.  She's still at camp.  If we don't get that form filled out, she has to be sent home.  And she's going to be very sad because it's her last year at camp and it's not even her fault.  So, that is really, really bad.

Basically, I'm left to clean this up. Here are my options:

1) Call the Dr,'s office and ask if she's had a physical within 12 months.  If she has, bribe them with chocolate, and get the Dr. to sign the form which I would then fax back.
Why that didn't work:  She didn't have a physical.  I am not her "legal guardian", and HIPPAA prevents me from getting her records without adoption or legal paperwork. Step parentage isn't enough. The Dr Office was not going to evaluate a child they haven't seen in over a year who isn't even standing there, so that someone whose last name doesn't even match (havent changed the name yet) can take the forms who knows where.

2) Forge the damn form and be done with it. *most attractive option
Why that didn't work:  I was scared.

3) Bring the younger lookalike to the Dr., say she's the older one, and get the form filled out that way, switchng the name at home
Why that didn't work: I was scared and that's even more illegal

4) Drive 3 hours to Hendersonville, pick her up, get her a physical there, and then go shopping at the outlet mall on the way home to make up for the inconvenience.

DING DING DING!!!  I bought the cutest jacket!!!  Actually I couldn't pick which color of the three I liked so I bought all of them.  David wasn't mad because I am such a good wife to go drive and handle that little problem for him.  I am also handling two car inspections today , a 3 hour dye job appointment, (I want to change it up ! Nordic Blonde to Fiery Brunette!!), grocery shopping, and picking up my son from his dad's. And cooking dinner among other wifely duties. 

Wait, what time is it?  Damn I better get started.  Look at you making me all late!!

I'll post an update after my hair is done!!

Love you to the moon!
Shannon